Don't Lose Your Humour
Take Jerry Seinfeld's word for it.
“Angels can fly because they take themselves so lightly.”
~ G.K. Chesterton (1874-1936)
This is one of the most important commencement speeches I’ve heard in a long while.
And it happens to be from one of my long-time favourite comedian, Jerry Seinfeld.
Humility
In his book, Ha! author Peter Kreeft said,
“Telling a good joke makes someone laugh, and making someone laugh is an act of charity. Therefore being a good comedian is a high and holy calling.”
Kreeft adds,
“The way humor makes us humble is that when we laugh, we lose control.”
Humour, after all, is etymologically linked to “humus” i.e., earth.
Below are snippets from Seinfeld’s commencement speech. I urge you to watch the short 16 mins speech in its entirety.
Find Fascination, Not Passion:
Let go of this idea that you have to find this one great thing. That is my passion, my great passion. With your shirt torn open and your heaving, pec muscles.
It's embarrassing. Just be willing to do your work as hard as you can with the ability you have. We don't need the heavy breathing and the outstretched arm from your passion. It makes coworkers uncomfortable in the cubicle next to you.
Find fascination.
Fall in Love
It's easy to fall in love with people.
I suggest falling in love with anything and everything. Every chance you get. Fall in love with your coffee, your sneakers, your blue zone parking space. I've had a lot of fun in life. Falling in love with stupid, meaningless physical objects. But the object I love the most is the clear barrel BIC pen, $1.29 for a box of ten. I can fall in love with a car turn signal switch that has a nice feel to it. A pizza crust that collapses with just the right amount of pressure.
I have truly spent my life focusing on the smallest things imaginable, completely oblivious to all the big issues of living. Find something where you love the good parts and don't mind the bad parts too much. The torture you're comfortable with.
Privilege
Privilege is a word that has taken quite a beating lately. Privilege today seems to be the worst thing you can have. I would like to take a moment to defend it. Again. A lot of you are thinking. I can't believe they invited this guy. Too late. I say use your privilege. I grew up a Jewish boy from New York. That is a privilege.
(Note: It appears that some students walked out.)
I now have an honorary Doctorate of Humane Letters degree from Duke University. And if I can figure out a way to use that, I will.
I haven't figured anything out yet. I think it's pretty much as useful in real life as this outfit I'm wearing. But so what? I'll take it.
My point is, we're embarrassed about things we should be proud of, and proud of things we should be embarrassed about.
On AI:
AI, on the other hand, is the most embarrassing thing we've ever invented in mankind's time on Earth.
What I like is we're smart enough to invent I dumb enough to need it. And still so stupid we can't figure out if we did the right thing
On Work:
Making work easier. This is the problem…T he only two things you ever need to pay attention to in life are work and love. Things that are self justified in the experience and who cares about the result. Stop rushing to what you perceive as some valuable endpoint. Learn to enjoy the expenditure of energy that may or may not be on the correct path.
Now, if you have been at this amazing place for four years and still have no idea what you like, what you're interested in, or what you want to do in life, you are the luckiest ones here…
The less secure and confident you feel in the direction, the more surprises and excitement you will have in store.
You know how they always say nobody ever looks back on their life and wishes they spent more time at the office? Well, why? Why don't they? Guess what? Depends on the job. If you took a stupid job that you find out you hate and you don't leave, that's your fault. Don't blame work. Work is wonderful.
On The Importance of Humour
I'm going to try and reach across a couple generations here to tell you the most important thing... I'm 70. I'm done. You are just starting out. I only want to help you.
The slightly uncomfortable feeling of awkward humor is okay. It's not something you need to fix. I totally admire the ambitions of your generation to create a more just and inclusive society. I think it is also wonderful that you care so much about not hurting other people's feelings and the million and one ways we all do that every second of every day.
It's lovely to want to fix those things, but, all caps, BUT, what I need to tell you as a comedian, do not lose your sense of humor. You can have no idea at this point in your life how much you are going to need it to get through. Not enough of life makes sense for you to be able to survive it without humor.
You got to laugh. That is the one thing at the end of your life you will not wish you did less of. Humor is the most powerful, most survival, essential quality you will ever have or need to navigate through the human experience.
Let there be levity in these times.
RELATED ARTICLES:
Humour: Part I
Humour: Part II
Humour: Part III
Humour: Part IV
Thank you for reading Full Circles: Meditations on the Inner and Outer Life. If you are new here, learn about me, and the About Page.
These posts are meant to be what Lewis Hyde describes as a “Gift.” What this “Gift” concept means for me is that
Nothing is expected out of you.
I hope you receive it.
I hope this animates and transforms you.
I hope you spread the love to others.
Thanks for reading Full Circles: Meditations on the Inner and Outer Life. Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.
Daryl Chow Ph.D. is the author of The First Kiss, co-author of Better Results, and The Write to Recovery, Creating Impact, and the new book The Field Guide to Better Results .
If you are a helping professional, you might like my other Substack, Frontiers of Psychotherapist Development (FPD).
